Product Search
Product Menu
Shop Help
Need to talk to someone?
Call us on 08 9313 8884
Shop Safe!
Our site uses 128bit SSL encryption making your shopping experience safe and secure. All prices are shown in Australian Dollars.
Mummy Diaries
As I write this there is a little boy who has scaled the tiles faster than the speed of light and started tugging on my ankles as he pulls himself up to stand to get a better look at what is going on. It's hard to believe that I ever had a life before our little boy.
I used to think I was so busy, running a business and living a standard working day to day life and now here we are, one year on and I can't remember that life I used to have and certainly don't miss it. (Except for the extra sleep of course). I am not sure what I used to do with all that free time but I imagine a mix of reality tv sessions, gossiping on the phone, emailing friends back home and sleeping in, filled a fair bit of that time.
What a learning curve this year has been. Imagine a life that we created ourselves and we are now the sole people responsible for raising this child and showing him about the world around him. I've always come from a close family and now I am trying to re-create the fun, loving and happy childhood I had with my own family. Not every day has been easy, some of them have been horrid, but the milestones he has achieved in such a short period of time and the love he shows us makes any bad day seem insignificant.
I'd like to share with you a bit of my journey. In my first year of being a mum I have developed a very strong opinion that every mother, father and child is different and it is important to be true to yourself and your instincts. No one knows your child like you do and no child is perfect. Certainly if you are feeling low or struggling which can happen as a passing phase or a more serious illness, there is medical help out there and it is okay to ask for help. Maybe you're just adjusting to the new change in your life and would like to meet some other Mums in the same boat, again there are options for you. Mothers groups, swimming sessions, lactation classes.
Motherhood is a change and a journey with many rewards but it isn't a perfectly formed picture, that is what makes it a real piece of art. Raising our son so far has been a real team effort with both my husband and I participating in the decisions we made on how we went about things. We both shared the highs and the lows and as a result we both have a lovely bond with our son.
Somedays I look at this little boy staring at me and I am overwhelmed with emotion. I can't remember my life before his birth and I feel a sense of fulfillment in life now. The happiness and love I didn't know I was capable of is ever present in me each and every day. I love waking up and having an early morning snuggle with my little boy. I love singing nursery rhymes actions and all, playing peek-a-boo, reading books and watching his face as he takes in more of the world each day. Now I know this is what life is all about and why I exist. Every day has taken on a whole new meaning. And all this from a previous career women..........
I would like to invite other Mums to briefly share their stories with other readers about the topics listed below. All articles will be screened for appropriateness and no pictures or names will be revealed without consent.
Birth
Birth. The word that everyone says in a million different ways to you as your pregnancy progresses. From excitement to dread the paranoias of birth is instilled in you from the day you tell everyone your expectant news. Whether it's your grandma's old wife tales or a customer in the shop, everyone has some story that they just HAD to share with you.
My due date was fast approaching and besides praying my little boy was not going to be born on Christmas day, I was also praying for a stork to deliver him to us, so I could experience a pain free birth and apply some foundation, straighten my hair and look glamerous in all my first time Mum photos.
I had never experienced any real form of pain before. Heartbreak, headache, hangover was about as tough as it had got, nothing a panadol or a day on the couch couldn't fix. So I was totally naive and a little apprehensive that although I was sooooooo ready for the pregnancy to be over and become a Mum, I sooooo didn't want to go into the finer details of how this was all meant to happen.
I live in a country town 85km from the nearest delivering hospital. I've had nightmares about delivering in a cow paddock under the stars with no mobile phone coverage and farmer Jo helping my husband deliver the baby. These thoughts made worse by my Mum's history of five precipitated labours and her constant reminders that I should be having the baby in the city to avoid this very problem occurring.
My thoughts also drifted to my best friend living in Scotland who texted me to say she was being induced and I'd then waited three whole days to hear any news at all and then finding out she'd had a long and complicated birth. She had her baby girl 2 weeks before I was due, it didn't instil any confidence.......at all. She kindly didn't go into detail of the horrifics of the birth unitl after I had had Cooper. Thank God.
I made it through Christmas day labour free, stuffing myself with all the great food that Christmas offers and enjoying time with my family who were all over from Western Australia to celebrate Christmas and of course the upcoming birth of nephew and grandson number one. A house full of 9 staying with us in total.
It wasn't unitl the wee hours of December 27th that I awoke unsettled and uncomfortable. I will avoid the finer details, but my glamerous stork plan did not eventuate but neither too did the cow paddock prediction occur either. And 6 hours later I was a Mum and my husband and I had become a family.
Sharing that moment with my husband was amazing. All birthing stories aside I will never forget the moment our little boy was born and the bond between my husband and I re-enforced. All new mothers, enjoy those few days post birth where your husband has nothing but absolute amazement and respect for the task you just undertook in delivering their child. Make it last as long as you can... 
Hospital
Some mothers can't wait to get out of hospital as quick as they can - me personally might check-in for a month next time. For me, the hospital was such an amazing time. My husband and I were in our own little world created by the four walls of our hospital room. The three of us there, bonding. No cooking, no cleaning, no dishes and alot of happy tears and positive vibes. I was expecting a baby to arrive and the world to go crazy all of a sudden. I'd have to jump off the labour table and bath, feed and change the baby all at once... and there would be crying and burping to deal with. I was shocked to realise that my new baby was recovering from the birth process as well. As he adjusted to the world my husband and I coudln't rest. Spending the days with my clearly excited visiting family who rotated shifts to come and visit us and the nights staring at this beautiful baby that was our own. Jumping to every flinch, laughing at every hiccup, talking about every feature and amazed at every minute at this creation. In retrospect this would have been a good time, to rest and sleep but so high on happiness and excitement we slept little and enjoyed this natural high, life had brought our way.
We were largely left to our own devices. Being a Christmas baby, the hospital was largely short staffed so like we've done our whole lives we figured things out and got on with the job.
Breastfeeding was the biggest thing we achieved alone. Breastfeeding by video (possibly could have done with a bit of guidance here, but a lesson learnt oneself is a lesson learned (I guess).
I believe Breastfeeding is a wonderful way to develop a bond with your child and yes it is convenient but I also understand that it is not always easy, doesn't always go to plan and can be hard work. Surround yourself with positive support as you establish the hows of breastfeeding and go looking for help when you need it with your nearest lactation consultant, Australian Breastfeeding Telephone Support or someone you know and feel comfortable with helping you "find your groove".
It was exciting and scary to leave hospital. Leaving the security and isolation of this magical world we had been in the past few days and going home to our own place where life would truly begin. I so wanted to go home, but with going home came the thoughts of a house full of visitors staying with me and coming by, the on-going responsibilty of my pharmacy business and all the other domestic duties that come with living life. It is daunting going home, where the mid wife isn't around the corner, dinner doesn't come at six, someone else is taking care of your business and you now have this little beautiful bundle which unfortunately didn't come with a "how to operate manual".
Nethertheless as we all do, home we went.
TIP: Ask all the questions you want in hospital, however silly you think they are. You are better off knowing an answer then forever wondering or worrying about a particular issue.
Baby Blues
Over 9 months your body has changed and grown in many ways, in one day it changes overnight again when you go through birth, then there is milk coming in, the highs of having a child and the fear of "oh my god, what comes next".
I still distinctly remember arriving home and standing over the nappy change table with tears streaming down my eyes. My poor husband so happy to have us home, cuddling me and asking what is wrong and me sobbing "I don't know".
Yes, there were a few tears and mostly over nothing. In fact most of the time, I couldn't tell you why I was crying. Sleep deprivation, utter exhaustion, feelings of being overwhelmed and hormones all played their part. Fortunately with the support of my husband and family, the baby blues came and went and life continued.
However if you are experiencing ongoing feelings of overwhelming saddness, suicidal thoughts or an inability to take care of yourself or the baby, you need to speak to a health professional. For more information please visit beyond blue.
TIP: Being a new Mum isn't about showing everyone how well you can juggle the house cleaning, cooking, the washing and taking care of a brand new baby all at once. It is hard work especially in the first few months, so focus on keeping yourself well by not overdoing it, sleeping when your baby sleeps during the day and looking after your new bundle. Housekeeping will always be there. I am still waiting for the fairy god mother to come and clean mine.
Breastfeeding Dramas
I am a fairly intelligent women working in the health industry, but I wouldn't have been able to explain the concept of milk coming in until I had experienced it myself, first hand.
What? Does a dairy farmer come in with his equipment and get things going?? No, not exactly but I did however go to sleep one night and wake up having found my naturally well endowed breasts had morphed into rock hard, out of proportion over sized watermelons over night. Shortly after this discovery came the "honey, can you please run to target to get me some larger bras?"
I was fortunate enough not to have a problem with milk supply. I had now officially joined the Jersey Cow family and often wondered if I was meant to have given birth to twins. Once I had found my confidence with breast feeding it wasn't that I didn't want to feed in public view, it was more that my milk resembled the average persons backyard sprinkler system or an army officer with a machine gun.
I could just imagine passer-bys diving for cover to avoid being shot down by my milk spray or people walking by me with umbrellas for protection. It certainly wasn't a pretty picture especially when there was a little bub at the end, struggling to attach for his food, drowning in what was meant to be dinner. Not something I felt I needed to make a point of in the open world. Thank God we got that $2000 lounge scotchguarded, if not to protect from sticky fingers down the track, it certainly would make it easier to clean up milk stains.
Aside from this, I was lucky to have no problems for the first six weeks of breastfeeding. It was tiring as I was often feeding 12-14 times per day and night and no-one can explain to you that feeling of exhaustion like I remember feeling. Some nights my husband said I was lucky I didn't misguide my landing on the bed, because my head hit the pillow so hard, one inch too far and I would probably have knocked myself unconscious on the bed head.
TIP: Word of advice from my beautiful little Grandma "Make sure you drink plenty of fluids whilst you are feeding or your milk is going to curdle".
Note: This is just an old wives tail and isn't true... at all
Nipple Thrush
After one particularly bad nights sleep, I started to get pain on attaching. I described it in an email to a friend as having 1000 pins stabbing my breasts all at once.This was new to me and within a day was becoming very uncomfortable. Being naive and an inexperienced new mum I assumed that in my zombie state I had attached wrongly during the night and had caused the problem myself. This was a real blow in the guts as things had been going great guns. Being in the country we had a mid-wife visit us fortnightly. Not being able to make our appointment she phoned me at home and I expressed my increasing uncomfortableness. "It's meant to be getting easier, not harder" I remember her saying. This rocked my confidence a great deal and I began focusing on every attachment trying to see where I was going wrong.
By the next day the pain was becoming intense. I am talking toes curling back, shoulders rigid, body braced and a cry of pain every time I went to feed. The next day a burning pain from my nipple back to my arm started radiating during, after and between feeds. Again in-experienced, I thought to myself this must be the let-down pain you hear of??"
I continued on to the point I had an intense fear of each feed, my nipples were fluoro red and so so sore. You couldn't come near them with a ten foot pole. No bras, no doona, loose fitting clothes only. It was aweful. I'd cry at each feed, from anticipation, from pain, from "what on earth is happening here". I wanted to lob a hand grenade at those adds saying breastfeeding is best for your baby. This friend of mine wears a rubber bracelet with the motto "Toughen the **** up". I thought of this every time I breast fed. I thought, I got through child birth, I can get through this. I'd think about how good breastfeeding was for my little boy, the best start for life and then I would wonder how I got myself into this hole and how good a tin of S26 baby formula looked.
I was so determined to breast feed my boy, so after a week of torture we drove the 85km back to the hospital to seek some help.
Emotional, over tired and all the rest... I sought help. I had already thought I must have thrush and wanted confirmation so I knew this pain would end. I left the hospital with the following advice." your attachment is perfect, you have just worked yourself into a bit of a state, go home and relax and you will find it much better". She said there was no sign of thrush in me or bub. Feeling like a bit of a clown, I went home and tried to relax about it thinking it must be all in my mind and maybe because I was sooooooo tired, everything was exagerated.
There was no improvement. I spent another 2 days dealing with it, barely. I was doing an emergency Pharmacy locum at a neighbouring town -with bub , extreme-tiredness and sore nipples in toe and had contacted my normal visiting mid-wife to come and see me. She was there all of two minutes and said to me, it is definitely thrush. I commenced treatment that second and within 48 hours my feeding had signifcantly improved.
Of course thrush had manifested itself in my milk ducts, so it took some time ( 4-6 weeks) to become symptom free, the burning sensation was present for some time which worried me that it was coming back, but no excruciating pain like the first 11 days. I emailed the Australian Breastfeeding Association when I felt it may be coming back and they advised me to undertake a yeast free diet for a period of time.
I tell this story because after that experience I completely understand why some women would give up breastfeeding, especially without an easy diagnosis. You get to the point where you think, why am I doing this?? The only thing that kept me going was that I was adament I wanted to breastfeed my son and I had a very, very supportive husband to help me persist.
So I will inform you of some of the symptoms of thrush infestation so that you can speak to your lactation consultant, doctor, pharmacist or the australian breastfeeding consultant about how to treat it if you are experienceing similar symptoms.
Thrush of the Aerola and Nipples can cause
- dry, red, sunburnt nipples that suddenly start to hurt when previously they didn't(mine were like traffic lights and I couldn't understand why I wasn't attaching right all of a sudden)
- Pain before, during and after a feed even when baby is well attached
- A burning pain radiating up the breast from the nipples especially after a feed
- Cracked, bleeding nipples
I happily continued breast feeding my boy unitl he was 9 months old.
Mastitis
Mastitis is another "breastfeeding drama" that a breastfeeding mum can experience. I had mastitis twice, but not until my boy was about 6 months old. He had always been a 3 hourly around the clock feeder for six months when all of a sudden he dropped 2-3 feeds per day literally overnight. I also had done a six week stint of full-time work so was quite run down. Mastitis is inflammation of the breast caused by blocked milk ducts. (Also called non-infective mastitis). The breast or parts of it, become tender, reddened and hard. There is also mastitis caused by a bacterial infection (infective mastitis). When you get infective mastitis the breast becomes red, swollen, hot and painful and the skin can appear streaked with red/pink. You feel very ill like you are come down with the flu and have a high temperature (over 38 degrees).
I describe infective mastitis like you have been hit by a truck.
I was saying good-bye to my Mum who had been visiting from Perth, the morning I developed infective mastitis. I woke that morning after a poor nights sleep with my little boy. I felt horrid but attributed it to my lack of sleep and feeling a tad delirious was nothing new to me. In saying good-bye to my Mum I couldn't even lift her suitcase into the car and when she left I fell in a heap on the couch where I watched the wiggles continuously as had no energy to take care of bub. There was no redness at this stage but my breast felt heavy, engorged and was uncomfortable as if someone had knocked me there. When I thought back about these symptoms, I thought that maybe that uncomfortable, heaviness had been there for a couple of days and I'd been too busy to think twice about it. In the afternoon I had a fever of 38.8 degrees and felt fluey or more appropriately put, absolutely crap. My husband took the afternoon off work to look after bub and I slept continously unless feeding. The next morning I visited the Doctor who prescribed me antibiotics as well as some other advice. It cleared up quickly with this.
Life-style advice for mastitis (blocked milk ducts)
- Offer the infected breast first to the baby when breast feeding can help treat a blocked milk duct
- Feeding frequently or expressing from affected breast
- Applying heat before a feed, gentle massage of the affected area and clod packs after for comfort
If no relief within 8 hours of mastitis symptoms or infective mastitis symptoms develop, ensure you see a doctor
Life-style advice for infective mastitis
- Continue breastfeding to ensure the breast is being adequately drained. (If you wish to stop breastfeeding it is important to wait until the infection has been cleared up to prevent an abscess developing)
- Antibiotics prescribed by a Doctor
- Pain relieving medication if necessary to relieve pain (talk to a health professional about what is suitable)
- Rest and adequate fluid intake
- Heat before a feed and cold after
- Talk to a breastfeeding consultant
At the end of the day, things happen that aren't always in your control and certainly aren't your fault. I was so pre-occupied with finding my feet as a Mum, my numerous visitors, as well as managing my business that when I began feeling off I assumed it was my own-doing and was burning the candle at both ends. I hope by reading this small piece on my breast feeding dramas, you can act quickly on any of the above symptoms and continue on breastfeeding your child just like those adds you see on television.
TIP: I love the breast feeding cushions that are available (see the baby bumper). Not only helps with positioning but makes long feeds more comfortable and manageable.
Sleepless Nights
Yes, a topic close to heart for all new Mums and one of great debate. From experts who tell us how we should be doing things, Mums who have never had a problem all the way to those parents who are absolutely exhausted by lack of sleep. I really liked Robin Barkers book called Baby Love, for so many reasons and would personally recommend it to all new Mums. She is positive, informative and provides a number of different scenarios re-inforcing the point that no two children are the same and you always have options and different things to try.
All new Mums are proud and sensitive and you know we aren't always open to criticism as constructive as it may be of our parenting skills. This is natural. There were many times I felt like telling some people what I thought of their ideas but then I would look at my son and see how happy we felt we were as a family and thought I don't need to be bothered by this because look at what I have.
Yes. I am guilty. Guilty of cuddling my baby all day. Yes, My husband is guilty. Guilty of cuddling his son all day. Yes, our family is guilty. Guilty of cuddling their first grandson or nephew whenever they could. But no, I don't care. I look at this child now crawling around and getting in to everything. Smile all over his face, he hasn't a care in the world and I think my goodness, where did that tiny baby go and I am so glad we all enjoyed him as a wee thing. Those moments wasted cuddling him for hours on end will stay with me forever.
He was a big feeder from day dot. Feeding every three hours (sometimes more often) around the clock for 6 months. Throw in a demanding pharmacy business, on and off family support visiting from Perth and being one that would not accept less then 9 hours of sleep in my previous life... lack of sleep was a big big shock.
Just having to feed so often was the inital shock, especially after the post-birth adrenaline shot had worn off. Feed one side, change a nappy, feed the other side, what do you know change another nappy (milk seemed to fly through, gurgling and all), wrap baby up and back to bed. This would take me 40 minutes, I'd then drift back to sleep again and just as my eye lids would shut and I'd be close to unconsciousness it was time to repeat the whole saga again. Where did that 1.5-2hours go?
Some nights I would hear the crying of a hungry voice and up I'd get and feed my little man and it was time to go back to sleep... but he was still crying, more intense, how could this be? Well I'd dreamed I'd picked the baby up, dreamed I'd fed him and in fact I hadn't even started the process yet... how demoralising. This happened regularly.
One night I woke up sitting in the recliner to find bubs asleep on my breast. I had absolutely no re-collection of when I'd pulled him out of the cot, what time I'd started feeding him, if I'd fed him both sides? Shaking my head, I put him back in his cot and returned to the warmth of my bed... obviously sorely missed by my husband.
Another night when he was quite established on his round the clock 3 hour feeding I got up to his cries and fed him as normal and an hour later he was crying again. I got up and started the process again, only realising half way through I had only just finished doing this moments ago.
There was one really delusional moment when it occurred to me how attached my bub had become to a ruggy I kept in the pram or his bouncer with him when he was awake. It was a beautiful soft ruggy with a teddies head that my Mum had purchased from America for him to snuggle to. He did indeed love the touch and feel of it and at 2.30 one morning it somehow occurred to my sleep starved brain that maybe he was looking for his rug in the night and that was why he was waking. The only problem was the rugs square was about 40 x 40 cm and way to big I felt to be leaving in a cot with a baby especially as I had first hand witnessed him pick it up and put it straight over his face and leave it there. Perplexed by this situation, I chose to hack the rug into a suitable size so that my boy would be happy to have it and I wouldn't have a heart attack all night that he would suffocate. When I say hack, I mean hacked.
Anyhow, it made do for that night and I remember waking the next morning to my husband saying "what the h**l happened to his ruggy?"No amount of rationalisation made sense to him, nor to my Mum when I tried to explain it to her and she said "You did what?? I got that from America". So we went off to the local dressmakers that morning to have my hack job, neatened up. To this day he still sleeps with his little ruggy, no matter where we are.
So the sleeplessness for my husband and I, is what we imagined babies to do and we just dealt with it together. We were offered all sorts of commentary and "helpful advice"
- "Oh you have a naughty child"
- "You cuddle him too much"
- "You should be control crying him"
- "You shouldn't be putting him to bed at this time, keep him up until 10"
- "He should be in bed by now, it's past 7pm"
- "You look aweful, aren't you getting any sleep"
- "I wouldn't cope if I were you"
- "You should never take the baby in to bed with you"
- "Move him out of your room"
- "Are you leaving him too cold at night"
- "The room is too hot"
- "You should start wrapping him now (at 6 months) or he will have behavioural problems his whole life
Everyone is trying to help but really it is so confusing at times and you just want to say "I didn't realise you knew our son so well". So you take it with a grain of salt, we laughed it off as a couple, making fun of the comments and then persisted with what we felt comfortable doing. My biggest recommendation would be to believe in yourself and your parenting as you know your child best. There will always be people out there that think they know better then you, you can listen to what they say take what you want out of it but don't let it upset you or your parenting. It is your child.
Slowly Cooper was learning to self settle and being strong believers in passive settling techniques, his day time sleeping had improved significantly. He now went off to sleep without a problem it was just how long he slept for. He was a cat napper for many months and I had become very talented at achieving alot in a small time. As time went on his general rule was a one hour sleep in the morning, one hour early afternoon, and fourty minutes late afternoon. He was happy with this, he wasn't grumpy, he wasn't whingey and more often then not had a cheeky smile on his face so I felt this was his normal. This pattern has continued throughout his first year.
Turning the Corner (Diary Exerpt)
What a week, I think it is finally begining to happen. The sleep thing that is. Some people told me the first six weeks is hardest on sleep and tiredness, others said they wished they could get a baby from 3 months of age because they didn't enjoy the first three months. As much as I love my beautiful boy and cherish being a Mum it has been six months of severe lack of sleep. Combining this with work and some days I resembled a walking, talking, slightly delirious zombie. I couldn't have imagined coping with this without my husband sharing the load.
It started about a week and a half ago when he missed his 10.30 feed. I awoke with a start realising it was 1.30 and I hadn't fed him. Waking my seriously unconscious husband, I sent him to bubs room expecting something drastically aweful had happened. He returned promptly to tell me he was snoring away in his cot. AMAZING. I wanted to run around the house with streamers and a bottle of champagne. He's slept for 6.5 hours solid. He didn't wake until 2.30am for a feed. Sitting on his toy box in his room I fed him. As most peoples minds don't think rational thoughts at such a time, I was sure the room smelt like gas. Maybe he was sleeping so much because he was being gassed to death? Gassed from what actually I don't know because we had a simple electric oil heater in his bedroom. As I said rational thinking and 2.30am don't mix.
Excited by one night, we tried not to think about it much more. Night one followed a couple more average nights until TIC TAC TOE, 7 nights in a row. What a blessing, things may have clicked.
Not many people would be excited about getting up at 2.30 in the morning but to only get up once during the night and not have a child waking and creating a fuss every hour on the clock was fantastic.
Life started to get even better, 2 weeks later we went to some friends for tea, where we put bub to bed in the pram at 7pm. Transferred him home to the cot at about 11pm and then didn't hear from him until 6am the next morning. He was exactly 7 months and this was the beginning of the return of our sleep.
It took a week for me to settle and sleep myself, so used to the constant disturbances and then the worry that something had to be so very wrong for this to be happening. But he had turned the corner. I wish I knew why, I wish I had the answers, but we have no idea what happened and my husband and I certainly weren't complaining. We'd done nothing different, tried nothing new to what we had done the past 4 months but things had improved a great deal.
Finally, I am feeling more human, more functional and so much more energetic and I realised just how strong my husband and I had been as a unit together to get through this period. Our motto was we would try anything once, but we never did anything that made either of us feel uncomfortable. We were a team and I was proud of this achievement.
I look back on those tiresome months and realise it really wasn't that long a time at all and I think fondly of my dear friend all the way across the globe (Glasgow) who was living as she termed the same "sleepless hell" we had been. It was nice to have someone who shared that same experience, understood what I was talking about and to know that if anything there were at least two naughty babies on this earth, that were cuddled too much, should have been control cried and were sleeping in a too hot and a too cold room. Furthermore these naughty babies had mothers who looked aweful and shouldn't have been putting their child into bed with them, even with extreme exhaustion. We laugh about it now.
My husband and I read a bit of information and talked about our feelings to our closest friends (Mummy Diaries) and then applied things to what we were comfortable with.
- Sleep Clinics. eg. Ngala in WA, Towsend House in SA
- Books for you to read and draw ideas from and see what is appropriate for you.
- Talk to friends and family
If you ever feel you may harm your baby, place your baby down in a safe place and leave the room for ten minutes. Call someone you know and trust for help or call the parents helpline to talk things through.
Work and Motherhood
The idea of going back to work after having a child is a choice for some people and a must for others. If we could all afford it I think alot of us would choose to stay at home with our child. Infact if we could all afford it and we didn't have children we'd probably still prefer not to work. I love being a Mum. I am definitely domestically disabled and no good at the keep the perfect house thing. I dislike dishes immensely and when my dish washer is out of action (yes, I am waiting for my husband to fix it.........) I absolutely detest doing dishes. Unfortunately they are a fact of life. However, I am lucky to have a husband that can cook and wants to. I'm not sure whether he really wants to because he enjoys it or because he dislikes my meat and veges or spaghetti bolagnaise in various ways, shapes and forms.
I returned to work when my bub was 4 months old. Firstly, because we needed the income. Secondly, because I still had a business to run. Lucky for me I could take my little man to work with me, much to my staffs delight. This had its advantages and disadvantages. It was so lovely to not be separated from my boy, I was still so attached and not ready to leave him in the care of anyone else. But I had to really pull my head in and focus because I now had alot on my plate. Checking prescriptions, counselling customers and paperwork in between breastfeeding, burping and nappy changing. I am so lucky to have been in a small rural town whereby customers and staff shared the experience of having bubs at work with me. I am also lucky to have had a husband that shared the night load with me, came in his lunch break to look after bubs for 45 minutes and took him home at the end of the day to start the night routine while I closed up the shop.
When I went to begin work, I knew I had a five week full-time 50 hour a week stint ahead of me before I had some relief coming to share the load. I cried the night before, wishing that things could have been different. It was full on to say the least and fortunately it takes a bit to rock my boat and I had a very laid back baby to help me along the way. I was never a big routine person as on any given day I didn't even know what our day may involve. This assisted me greatly as I had a child that was also used to travelling, sleeping in alternative arrangements to his normal cot (he loved the pram for a long time). A stressed upset baby can lead to a stressed upset mummy but fortunately this was rarely experienced and I attribute it not only to my boys laid back nature, but our parenting based to fit in with our already established lifestyle. Yet alone all his extra Aunties and Grannies that gave him way more attention then he would have had at home with just the two of us. All in all I did the equivalent of about 14 weeks of full time work with my little boy in toe before I was able to drop my work load. I don't regret having him with me for a second and don't know how I would have gone otherwise. It was tiring and was hard work and I dare say I was less efficient then I used to be but we all work with the tools we have available to us and make the best out of the cards we are dealt. You never know I may have a new staff member ready for next summer, he has certainly mastered the smile of customer service and is a great attraction for customers.
Now days I am lucky to have a responsible and caring Pharmacist who has moved to the country to share my work load leaving me with 2.5 days a week in the shop. One is a Sunday which gives Dad and Bub some bonding time and now on Mondays he goes to 1 day of full child care. Again a big step for all new Mums and I only experienced it when my boy was 9.5 months old, so I can empathise but maybe not understand how other Mothers feel having to use childcare more often and from a younger age. In saying that I think it worried me more then my little boy. I remember his third week and no sooner have I put him down on the floor and put his lunch in the fridge I see he has scaled the babies play area and is on his way faster then a speeding bullet to the bigger kids playing. I see one boy pat my son on the head, pick up his dummy off the floor and put it in the mouth and I watch him checking out all the other kids and picking up some toys to join in. I realise this will be a great part of his social development and something I cannot offer him at home or work at this stage. So I feel this one day a week will be of benefit to him even if I spend my whole day thinking about him... every second.
He now spends one day a week in the shop and I know I am alive on that day. But, I still remind myself way back to when I was a child who also grew up on the floor of a Pharmacy and some how my parents and I survived so hopefully so to will my boy.
Milestones
Each milestone your child reaches is of course better then any other childs achievements in the history of all children. We as parents are definitely biased, definitely adoring and love each and every new milestone except maybe the teething.
- The first smile and all the silly voices and faces you do from that moment to encourage a second, and a third, and so on it goes.
- The first laugh and has any noise on the planet made you as parents grin or laugh more.
- The first time he rolled over a couple of times in succession at such a young age (3 months) and then never did it again until he was 7 or 8 months. We wanted to cheer and tell the world.
- His first sounds.
- When he started to understand what his hands were and began to clap and play open shut them. It felt like the beginning of the breakdown of the communication barrier and you really felt like you were properly interacting.
- When he kissed me on my cheek for the first time or would give me a deliberate cuddle.
- When he'd hold his arms out to me and his body would turn whatever direction I was heading. Emotional blackmail I used to call it as I would go over and pick him up.
- The first crawl, the first stand... the first banged hear or fingers shut int he draw ouch!!
- When we saw those first toothy pegs come through and we were amazed that they were there
Each week would provide some new first or something that would just blow you away. If only we as adults could learn as fast as we did as children. Absolutely amazing.